All this time I thought that human hubris would bring down the Internet eventually, but alas, it’s being consumed by something much cooler: sharks.
Sharks are eating the undersea cables that connect our modern world. There are a lot of theories as to why they would want to eat the cables, but I like to think that sharks have seen Jaws 2, have had Shark Council meetings about the ending, where Roy Scheider causes the shark’s death by tricking him into biting a giant cable, and now they’re all like, “take THAT, bitches!”
But seriously, sharks are older than us humans. Much older. Maybe they’re tired of our crap on their turf, (what I like to think) or maybe they really do think that the cables are some kind of electric fish or sea snake.
Then there’s the case of the internet running out of room. There’s no human-created resource that has an infinite supply. Has there ever been? What were people thinking? Take care of what you create and keep feeding it and reinventing it. No matter how awesome an invention, it will always need to be revamped to meet new demands over time. If people don’t preserve what they invent, like any other kind of forgotten-about human residue that ends up in the ocean, it’ll get eaten up by sharks, both literally and metaphorically.